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| Character Education | |
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| Topic Started: Jan 22 2008, 08:27 PM (192 Views) | |
| Post #1 Jan 22 2008, 08:27 PM |
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If you haven't read this story, click on it before reading the second part of the story. Our school's accrediting agency (which also is responsible for running the conferences that our sports teams play in) has a strict policy regarding sportsmanship. Individuals and schools can be fined $500 for unsportsmanlike activity. It is a reasonable policy--when administered reasonably. Unfortunately, there is as little character in that administration as in the acts of unsportsmanship the policy seeks to deter. As I related in the earlier post, our coach was the only victim of this drunken parent (well, his daughter, too, indirectly). The coach handled the situation well. Had the parent not been abusive with the deputy, the incident would have passed, relatively unnoticed. Unfortunately, it was noticed. The matter came to the attention of the headmaster of the host school. He grabbed the bull by the horns and fired off a letter to the accrediting agency. His team was unaffected by the to-do. Our school representatives handled it well. Even if that headmaster felt the need to write a letter, that letter should have been the end of it. The offender had paid a hefty price for his drunken behavior and the target of his incivility was satisfied that nothing more needed to be done. Right? Wrong. It seems that the headmaster described the drunk as the parent of one of the players and a math teacher--with a beard--at my school! (I am the only bearded math teacher.) The accrediting agency, as well they should when a faculty member is arrested at a game for his drunkenness, assessed our school with a $500 fine. We, of course, responded that the drunk was not a teacher, that he was a parent, that only our people were affected by his actions, and that we had dealt with him to our satisfaction. No matter, the accreditation agency said the fine was not because of the unfounded accusation of a teacher (of me, that is). If we did not want to be out $500, we should get it from the parent. Fat chance. And, we are certainly not going to victimize his daughter any more than he already has. Well, I thought, at the very least, the headmaster owed me an apology. We played that school again here tonight. He was there. I called him aside and reminded him of the earlier events. He interrupted me and said he knew where I was headed. So, I let him talk, assuming that he would man up and apologize. No such luck. He shifted the blame for the misunderstanding to the deputy. (Why he'd think the dad was a teacher, I can't fathom, but, no matter.) However, he did not write in his letter that the deputy informed him that the drunk was a teacher. Had that been the case and had he wrote that in his letter, he would have been reporting facts, and I'd have no gripe with him (with the deputy, but not with him). Instead, he did not attribute the charge to anyone else, so he, in essence, was making it and is wholly responsible. He said that he called the accrediting agency to set the record straight after receiving our letter. He said that, if anyone else brought it up to him, he set them straight, too, and aksed them not to discuss it further. Unfortunately, he also said that he did not owe me or my school an apology. He said that we would have done the same. I told him that I would not. I thanked him for listening to me. We shook hands and parted. I learned something about his character tonight. It was not a positive. He does not accept responsibility for his mistakes. Worse, he is partly responsible for shaping the characters of children. What a shame. Anyway, something in this vein happened earlier today. There was a problem with a few of our varsity basketball players and some others who were being a bit disrespectful. I got a little too upset about this and ranted a bit at the coach about his players. He looked kinda dazed at me. I huffed off. Later today, I sought out the coach and apologized. I told him that there was no excuse for the way I talked to him. He said it was OK, that he knew me, knew that I had reason to be upset, and knew that the way I handled it was not the way I normally would. I said I was sorry, anyway, that I should have handled it better. He said not to worry and that he did talk to his players about how they should address teachers. The coach knew me. Had I not apologized, he would not have thought any less of me. He would have chalked it up to we-all-say-something-stupid-from-time-to-time. That's the advantage of knowing people. We get to cut them slack. However, when you have exactly one contact with another person, such as this headmaster had with me, your entire impression of the person is based on that one contact. Based on this one observation, I don't think this headmaster has much character. Maybe, I'll get to know him better sometime. Until I do, the only impression he has left me with is a bad one. |
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2:58 PM Feb 6